Ever feel like you're walking around with a little black raincloud over your head? That's been me for the past 3 days. Maren figured out on Wednesday night that she could climb out of her crib. I know that prior to then she absolutely could have physically done it; the child is like Spiderman in her ability to scale the furniture and appliances in this house. I attribute it solely to a tender mercy of the Lord that it took her this long to realize that she could do it.
Thursday morning at about 6:45 a.m. I was awakened from a blissful slumber by a -thump- and a little voice saying proudly, "I get out!" followed by a bedside visit from the owner of that little voice. I'm going to confess: when I heard that thump I knew exactly what (or rather, who) it was, and the first thought that popped into my head was a four-letter word not suitable for polite company. My fears were well-founded, as I am now unable to confine Maren anywhere in the house, which for her means NO NAPTIME! I can't make her stay in her crib to take a nap in the afternoon if she doesn't want to, and she rarely wants to. Oh, she needs to take a nap, she just doesn't realize that, so I wasn't surprised at all when she started to melt down at about 5:00 p.m. yesterday afternoon.
Perhaps more than Maren needs a nap, I need her to take a nap. Naptime has always been my favorite time of the whole day, and if it makes me a bad mom to say that, so be it. I have always looked forward to and relished those few hours of peace and quiet and solitude when I don't have to be Mommy; I can just be Heidi again. Sometimes I take a short nap, other times I do chores that are easiest without little hands undoing all the work right behind me, and sometimes I even do something crafty without the threat of those little hands tearing up or spilling my supplies. Either way, those hours are precious and quite vital to me and when Maren doesn't take a nap I get cranky and short-tempered and I count the minutes until Quin comes home so I can get a break.
The prospect of no more afternoon naps because I can't keep Maren in her bed makes me incredibly distressed. Short of installing a net over the top of the crib or handcuffing her to the crib bars, I'm out of ideas. I have a feeble hope that maybe the novelty of climbing out will wear off after a few days and naptime will resume. Until that happens (if it does), I'm going to be praying hard. I just don't know what else to do.
My aunt used to tie my cousin to his bed, for the sake of her sanity. . . maybe you should try that ;)
ReplyDeleteAny chance she'd crash on the couch in front of a DVD instead?
I am dreading the day when my little guy figures out he can climb out of his crib. The positive thing about my older two giving up naps was they went to bed early. Very early. The went down around 6:30 for the longest time, and I loved those evening hours to myself. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteIf she is climbing out of a crib then I would say it is time for a toddler bed so she doesn't get hurt. Installing a child gate on her bedroom that only you can open can keep her in the room. I have an Autistic girl & we had to do this...unfortunately we had to remove the gate when my youngest had to share the room most recently (potty in the night & all - autistic still has to wear diapers), and that means our non-verbal autistic girl age 6 runs out at the crack of dawn screeching merrily thru the house! Sanity left me a long time ago.
ReplyDeleteOh man. Been there. Never, ever want to go back there.
ReplyDeleteYou probably want to consider a toddler bed so she doesn't get hurt. Secondly, shut the door to her room. (That slowed Jack down for awhile.)
You will have to do the Supernanny thing where everytime she gets out of bed you go back in there and put her back in bed. Don't speak to her when you do it, just keep silently returning her to bed.
With Jack it took about 3 days (and I had to do the bed returning thing for 3 hours every day during that period), but it finally worked.
If after a week or so she just doesn't give in then I think you have to move on to introducing "quiet time." When Jack wakes up at 5 am, I insist that he return to his room and play in there quietly until I can function to get up with him.
It will be really hard Heidi, physically and emotionally. But stick with it. You are NOT a bad mother for needing a break. We all do.
Email me if you want to talk more in depth about it.
I've been reading your blog and really enjoying it! I wanted to let you know that we have used a crib tent for all 3 of our kids. You can buy them at upscale baby shops or Ebay. They are a little pricey but soooo worth it. Our friends had a little boy that climbed out of his crib 6 times in one night! They borrowed our crib tent and LOVED it!! My little girl just turned 2 and she has the crib tent on her crib - it will stay there until we are ready to move her into a twin bed. Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteYou're not a bad mom for needing some time "away" from your little one. You having some alone time for yourself is VITAL to you continuing to be a good mom. She also needs that nap time, for her own good. I with others here who have suggested a youth/toddler bed. then she might feel "grown up" to have a big girl bed and not give you any hassle about laying down. Give it a try. Good luck and I'll be praying for you.
ReplyDelete:D Brenda
Heidi--don't feel bad for wanting and needing a break, everyone does it definitely is normal to feel that way. I was thinking along the same lines as Sarah--doing the super nanny way would be a good way to start. I had to do that with my son with going to bed at night when he got older and could get out of the bed when ever and eventually it works. The other thing for me is getting a routine and sticking to it--give Maren a time warning, let her know she has 30 minutes before naptime...show her on the clock when thirty minutes will be up; then tell her at 15, 10 and then when it's time for a nap do the super nanny thing if she gets out. Like Sarah said, the hardest part will be the first few days but after that, she will probably get into the groove of it and welcome her nap too!
ReplyDeleteI have 4 children ages 4-17, and we never even owned a crib.
ReplyDelete( I'm not sure how old Maren is . . )
Lay down with her and take a nap too.
Enforce a daily quiet time, instead of a nap time. Have an outdoor recess instead and enjoy an earlier bedtime.
Give up your ideal interior for a while and put mattresses on the floor.
This is mothering, but this too will pass.
I love "quiet time" and I still have my 5 year old take it sometimes. He doesn't sleep but he is pretty good about laying in bed and reading for 30 minutes or so.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard when they are younger though. I often would lay down with them or beside their bed, read a book and rub their back and if they were sleepy they would fall asleep within 10 minutes or so(and sometimes I would too)-Sometimes I would just put them in bed and close the door and they would cry a little and lay down by the door and fall asleep and then I would move them to the bed. Once they can open the door it gets hard but I just promise them-"if you go lay down and look at books for 1/2 an hour or an hour I will do something special with you after quiet time. Good luck Heidi- my little Joshua is getting close to that time too-he's 19 months and already prefers to fall asleep lying in the bed we have in his room instead of the crib.
hey fraulein
ReplyDeletesounds like you've had plenty of good advice, but i'll add mine to the list. it is perhaps a more lazy approach, but...it has worked here. you know those plastic door knob things that people use for their front doors so that their kids don't flee the house? they also work great for keeping kids in their rooms :) so now, the new routine at our house is to have winding-down activities, and then it's off to the room of no escape for naptime. half the time jackson plays with toys before he actually gets around to napping, but so far, he has always fallen asleep eventually. there was crying for the first day or so, but now, no biggie. naptime has been reinstated, plus the added perk of quiet playtime, which nicely pads my alone time with extra minutes!
love, your evil friend
emily
Oh Heidi, I could not have survived had I not insisted that my kids have a "nap time". And they all did until they started kindergarten. But they didn't HAVE to nap... they just HAD to stay in their room and have a two hour quiet time... playing, singing, whatever. They just could not come out until the two hours was up... and most of the time they fell asleep anyway! So it was a win-win for all of us. I had my alone time... and they learned to play alone in their rooms. It may take a few days to teach her that she has to stay in her room... but if you stay strong... she will learn to enjoy the time. Keep us posted on how it goes.
ReplyDelete